I haven't been sleeping well. Feeling restless is one of my least favorite things, and my brain's inability to stop fretting over the unknown at night is becoming unbearably frustrating.
Sometimes I think about my day. I replay scenarios a million different ways even though it's not fruitful labor. Often I plan my week - conversations I ought to have, things I ought to do, decisions I ought to make. My best laid plans come together between midnight and 2 AM and are never acted out in any reality outside of my bed. Partly because I forget those fleeting thoughts so easily, but mostly because I'm afraid.
Most of the time I question my feelings - my instincts, intuition, and emotions. I wonder what I could be doing differently. I wonder what I'll be doing differently in 5 years. I have not changed all that much these past 5.
It must be easier to confront things in the still darkness of my bedroom. Maybe my brain waits until night-time on purpose.